I was in Starbucks minding my own business, when a lady shows up with a couple large empty covered plastic containers. A Starbucks employee proceeds to give her all the dated pastries for her containers and she hangs around at a table in front me sorting things out.
After a while, i get up to leave and go to work. I stop in front of her and make comment that i bet she is going to make some people happy. She explains she is from the Saint Assisi or something catholic church and these pastries will go to feed the homeless. As we are chatting about the local homeless shelter, i am doing a heart check and i think God is saying give her money. You have to understand there was a time when giving from my excess was not challenging at all. Today, i give from what i don’t have and i am very aware to give without God’s direction is stupid.
So as she is talking, i am thinking, “God. Do you want me to give? i am not sure and i want to be responsible with the little i have.” i am confident this thought was from God. “Whether you give or not, you will know my will when you walk out the door.” It reminded me of the times, i heard God and chose to ignore the opportunity to be used by Him. I get that really sick feeling in my stomach that i just blew it.
Today, i was not going to blow it. i reached in my pocket and pulled out the exact amount God had impressed on me (without counting). I handed it to the lady and without a word, began walking out. She yelled, “What’s your name?” I wish i had said, “Jesus.”